Sometimes, it's awful

It's hard, you know. Doing all that I'm doing.

Currently, in my efforts to get established, I have a booth at least 3 cons a year, work on my comic between school assignments, improve my website, take commissions, and spend my very little and rare extra money on con supplies and such.

And it's tiring. And sometimes it feels like I'm going nowhere and I'll never get anywhere.

Like this recent con I did. It came out of the blue and was unplanned. This was the third con I've shown at, and my first two cons were at big locations and I made decent bank. But this con was dreadful in every way. Everything you can imagine would go wrong, went wrong. I forgot my prints the first day, so I only had my sketchbooks and Collide Chapter 1 prints. The con was tiny (I mean, super tiny) and we didn't even get 300 visitors in the entire show, I think. And to make it worse, I broke even exactly; it wasn't a financial gain at all. It was really rough and frustrating. I don't plan on going back to that con for a few years, to see if it improves or something.

But I think it's important to realize things aren't always going to be marvelously easy. Even if you get a publisher by sitting on the train and the guy next to you happens to work for Marvel or Oni Press, and he sees your work and BOOM, you're published. Even if that happens... you're going to feel like a failure sometimes.

And if you do cons on your own time and money, you know the deep penetrating terror that you will spend over a hundred dollars to get a booth, another hundred to make prints, and whatever extra you spend to advertise on your table, and you will utterly fail. You won't sell anything. You'll forget everything. Something, everything will happen.

So it was healthy for me, I think, to realize that even if I forget all my prints (that was the deepest fear for me), I'll still be okay.

Also!

If you do cons, have something you do on-site and make money off of. My friend, Megan, does on-site sketches and illustrations; I do tiny art cards of well known characters. If you have something you can do on the spot, you'll be able to make those extra dollars.

Anyway, that awful con is over, and I have a big BIG con in October. Alternative Press Expo. I'm terrified. Utterly. Terrified.